Carly Explains it All: Spring Break

Well, it’s over. The big tease that is spring break has come and gone for us, but the party is just getting started on MTV, who will air their annual Spring Break bash on March 28. Except this year the favorite college holiday is getting a bit of a makeover, as MTV moves their celebration  from the shores of Mexico and Florida to the Las Vegas strip.

When I was a kid, MTV was the big-sister-who’d-buy-you-cigarettes I never had. I don’t fancy myself a rebel, but the few rebellious tendencies I do have probably result from my watching MTV’s Spring Break every year until I left the ‘burbs.

I remember it like it was yesterday. Jerry Springer, whipped-cream bikinis, wet and wild versions of “Singled Out,” American flag thongs, No Doubt jamming “Just a Girl” and Daisy Fuentes in a pair of Daisy Dukes; those were the good ol’ days.

But this year MTV is making the party 21+ as they’ve decided to host their annual bash at the Palms in Las Vegas, changing the face of spring break for young Americans everywhere who have nothing better to do but sit on their couches and dream of jello shots. The network’s website promises performances from Snoop, Lupe Fiasco, Pit Bull and Wiz Khalifa.

Does MTV even know the words “rock ‘n’ roll” anymore?

As if their lack of diversity in musical guests isn’t bad enough, their change in location is what’s really going to ruin the vibe. By moving spring break from the beach to a place that no one over 21 can enjoy, MTV is totally cheating their own target audience. The kids that keep MTV on air couldn’t even get past security at the Palms, let alone get served.

By contrast, the beach represents a safe haven for kids to let go and be wild. I’m not condoning underage drinking, I’m just arguing for them to have wide open spaces -- for places they could enjoy -- that is if they could get their parents’ permission.

People often ask me why I care about MTV so much. Why, when most people our age have moved on to more dignified sources for pop culture news, have I continued to admire it?  It’s because I believe that MTV is so connected to our country’s youth that if you were to be cryogenically frozen for 10 years and woke up wanting to know where the world stood, you could turn on MTV and find out.

This year, they’d find out it’s all gone to the craps table.