Former Dominatrix to Whip Students' Writing into Shape

Melissa Febos, a casually dressed, sweet-faced brunette, lacks what one would expect from a sex worker. In her latest work, “Whip Smart: A Memoir” (Thomas Dunne Books March, 2010), Febos recounts her double life as drug-addicted Mistress Justine and a passionate college writing student. Febos attended Eugene Lang College in 1999 while working as a professional dominatrix. This upcoming spring, she will return as a professor for first-year writing students.

“For obvious reasons, it’s hard for people to hold in their minds that I was an active drug addict, a college student at The New School, and a sex worker by choice,” Febos said.

Neither her drug addiction nor financial instability pushed Febos to work at the Midtown S&M chamber The Dungeon. “It was totally a voluntary decision for me,” said Febos, “I was really ballsy and curious about things.”

“I’ve always [had a] romanticized idea of sex work, but I’ve also been a strong feminist since I was a child and for me being a dominatrix was the only avenue of sex work that my politics wouldn’t be in conflict with,” Febos said. Her preconceptions about sex work were “completely overturned.” She said experiencing the industry first-hand “was really humbling and mind opening.”

Melissa Febos worked as a dominatrix while attending Lang (Courtesy of Melissa Febos)

“I [now] have a much broader, more generous definition of what’s healthy in terms of desire, in terms of behavior, my own definition of what feminism is and how much more inclusive it can be,” Febos said.

Though her years as a dominatrix were dangerous and painful, Febos grew from the taboo practice. “Those experiences not only gave me material for writing, but it made me a better person,” she mentioned.

Febos recalled being an outcast years before working as a dominatrix. “As a tiny feminist bookworm growing up in a smallish town, I definitely felt like an outsider,” she said. “Even now, as a former sex worker cum memoirist in academia, I still sometimes feel like an outsider.”

Febos said she plans to share her experience as a deviant during her adult and teenage years with her prospective students in the class NYC: Outsider City.

“I’m going to have my students try and find an outsider community that they identify with,” Febos said. “[New York is] very much made up of groups of people who felt like outsiders in other places, or felt like outsiders here, and then started their own movement or kind of art or community.”

Febos is excited about her return to The New School. “Lang students are pretty much my ideal students: bright, curious, creative [and] questioning.”

Febos said that her time at Lang was a positive experience. “I remember [going to Lang] and being so enormously relieved because everyone was really smart and not afraid to say what they thought,” Febos said. “When I was there I totally fantasized about teaching there.”

Febos is preparing to share material that has left an impact on her life. “I just want to show people the stuff that opened my heart and made me think,” she said. “Pretty much everything that I’ve ever taught is just an excuse [for my students] to experience the stuff I think they should.” She hopes to remain at Lang for a while, eventually teaching creative writing.

In the meantime, Febos will continue to work on a new untitled novel, centered on female friendship and its complexities, before her Lang homecoming.

“As a professional writer now, I’ve become more and more aware of how lucky I am to have known what I wanted to do. So if you know what you want to do, just sink your teeth in and don’t ever let go.” She bluntly added, “And if you’re not finding it where you are, then look somewhere else.”